19 white dudes changing the face of the Senate

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Photos: Unsplash.

In the past, the same kind of person composed the entirety of America’s government. But as America’s population grows increasingly diverse, and as citizens realize the effects of electing minorities and underrepresented groups to office, the need for a legislative body to reflect the diversity of the people it governs has become more widely recognized. “The more diverse a group of decision makers is, the more informed the decision will be,” California senator Kamala Harris recently tweeted. Unfortunately, progress is discouragingly slow, and Congress is composed of more or less the same type of person it was a century ago.

In times of representation stagnation, it’s easy to become disheartened. So when you get bummed out about your governing body’s lack of diversity, it can help to remember the many historic steps forward. Just take a look at these Senate game-changers, all of whom are bringing a fresh perspective to Congress, the majority of which looks totally different than them.

 

 

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Official photo via Lamar Alexander

1. Lamar Alexander

The third-term senator hails from Maryville, Tennessee, and is a tireless advocate for states’ rights. The Republican served as the 45th governor of Tennessee and as the Secretary of Education under George H. W. Bush. He’s also a white male. Diversity win!

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Official photo by Frank Fey

2. John Barrasso

The orthopedic surgeon, who was once voted Wyoming Physician of the Year, now represents the state in the Senate. After changing career tracks and running for public office, he received an “A” grade from the National Rifle Association and a 9 percent lifetime score on the National Environmental Scorecard of the League of Conservation Voters. He is a passionate member of the white male Senate bloc and has expressed his pride in participating in such a historic movement.

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Official photo via Michael Bennet

3. Michael Bennet

This Democratic white dude acted as the Superintendent of Denver Public Schools before being elected Colorado’s senior United States Senator. Bennet lists immigration reform, energy efficiency, and quality education among his top political priorities. He seems like the kind of white dude who actually liked “The Awakening” in high school; however, this has not been confirmed.

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Official photo via Richard Blumenthal

4. Richard Blumenthal

Before representing the state of Connecticut in the Senate, Blumenthal served five terms as Connecticut’s Attorney General. His tireless work in both positions has ensured that consumers, laborers, victims of crime, and white men everywhere finally have a voice in government.

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Official photo via Roy Blunt

5. Roy Blunt

The Missouri Republican has a background in education, having acted as a history teacher and university president. Missourians elected Blunt to the House of Representatives seven times before his 2010 Senate election. He hates online poker and minimum wage raises and loves restricting over-the-counter drugs used to make meth. Blunt, as a white, male United States senator, is a powerful leader of a severely underrepresented group.

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Official photo via John Boozman

6. John Boozman

This healthcare-provider-turned U.S. Senator is the chair of the White Men with Glasses Caucus.

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Official photo via Sherrod Brown

7. Sherrod Brown

Brown, a former Ohio State University instructor and Ohio Secretary of State, speaks one-on-one with constituents at community roundtables, making sure he hears the views of his 82.7-percent Caucasian voter base.

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Official photo via Richard Burr

8. Richard Burr

Before representing North Carolina in the Senate, Burr served in the House of Representatives for a decade and worked in the private business sector for seventeen years. The white man is anti-abortion, anti-Dodd Frank, and anti-Trans-Pacific Partnership. He is pro-states’ rights, pro-Keystone XL, and pro-repealing the Affordable Care Act. Unlike Michael Bennet, Richard Burr didn’t even read the whole book and called Edna a crazy bitch.

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Official photo via Ben Cardin

9. Ben Cardin

Not only does Ben Cardin contribute to the pathetically small numbers of white male senators, he is also a member of the Cute Grandpa Club. (Note: while most of the senators on this list belong to the Creepy Old Man Who Tells You You’re Pretty in Church Club, their accomplishments are in no way less valued.) The Maryland representative advocates for the integration of human rights into foreign policy and environmental protection. Cardin was described by The Baltimore Sun as “a man of substance and integrity who understands complicated issues and the art of compromise.”

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Official photo via Tom Carper

10. Tom Carper

Carper is a Democratic senator from Delaware who has mastered the art of the white-male senator-grimace-smile.

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Official photo via Bob Casey

11. Bob Casey

Like my boyfriend, Pennsylvania senator Bob Casey believes in an improved support system for victims of sexual assault, excellence in public education, and a safety net for underprivileged individuals. Also like my boyfriend, he flaunts a “I don’t give a fuck, I’m a white male” unibrow look.

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Official photo via Bill Cassidy

12. Bill Cassidy

As one could presume from his name, Bill Cassidy is a Republican white man. He serves as senator for the state of Louisiana.

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Official photo via Thad Cochran

 

13. Thad Cochran

The Mississippi senator was elected to the senate in 1978. He is the third most-senior Senator and the second most-senior Republican member, making Cochran the Oldest of the Old White Government Dudes. He can spell his state faster than you.

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Official photo via Chris Coons

14. Chris Coons

The Delaware Democrat is an unapologetic white male voice in a sea of other white male voices.

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Official photo via Bob Corker

15. Bob Corker

Corker, a Republican from Tennessee, was elected into the Senate in 2007, joining the ranks of white male senators gazing broodingly into the camera like they’re posing for an adolescent Air Supply cover album sleeve.

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Official photo via John Cornyn

16. John Cornyn

The Senate Majority Whip and Texas senator’s backstory sounds like the stuff of my parents’ nightmares: “After starting as a biology major, hoping to become a doctor, Sen. Cornyn realized science wasn’t his passion and he switched to journalism and worked for the school paper.” Thanks, John Cornyn, for the inspiration to follow your dreams (if you’re a white man).

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Official photo via Tom Cotton

17. Tom Cotton

Judging by his website photos alone, Tom Cotton is either a buckskin horse or a bale of hay. Understandably, the voters of Arkansas voted the white man into office in 2015.

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Official photo via Mike Crapo

18. Mike Crapo

Like so many of his fellow white men, Crapo won’t answer his phone, even as jilted lovers/angry constituents grow increasingly desperate. Why won’t you answer my calls, Mike? Do you really love Betsy more than me?

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Official photo via Ted Cruz

19. Ted Cruz

Texas senator Ted Cruz, alias Rafael Cruz, is the son of a Cuban immigrant and founded the Latino Law Journal at Harvard and is therefore an Honorary Listicle White Man. (Disagree with his inclusion? Listen to him speak for ten minutes and get back to me.) He ran for president in the 2016 election and lost to a Twitter addict with a bad comb-over. Cruz has won the US National Debating Championship, the North American Debating Championship, and the title of The World’s Most Punchable Simpering Face. He is totally not the Zodiac Killer.

 

Feel better about your lack of representation in government yet? Me, too!

 

Last updated: February 16, 2017, 12:25 PM by Madison Shumway

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